Blogathon 2012 - May 29. Zip It

The reasons why and instances when you speak up and speak out can be varied and valid. However, there are a few circumstances when silence is indeed golden. The phrase, “Zip it!” is interesting. It is concise, precise and leaves no room for confusion about what you should do and the urgency in doing it.
So when should you wise up and zip it?

When you are right
Just knowing that you are right should be motivation enough to hold your tongue in the face of scepticism, criticism and prejudice directed at you. Sometimes, silence the most effective way to make your point. You exhibit dignity, grace and self-control—all of which shine through when you zip it.


When you are wrong
Wrong and strong and vocal is not a good combination. In fact, it is an uncomplimentary description, which can tarnish your reputation. If you walk into a room and people clam up and shun you, it may be that your reputation came in ahead of you. Being wrong is no disgrace. Once you make that discovery, just zip it.  


When you are not sure what to say
Freedom of speech is not a licence to broadcast your ignorance at family gatherings, in class, in meetings or at social functions. Pontificating on issues about which you have no clue, only amplifies your lack of knowledge and the wisdom to know when to zip it. This piece of wisdom comes from the Book of Proverbs, in the Bible - “Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is considered prudent.” Proverbs 17:28. So prove yourself prudent and zip it.


When you are angry
Raging arguments can easily culminate into violence. One hurtful word, one insult, one sarcastic remark, one tease, followed by a barrage of verbal reciprocity and the next thing you know, you have a major brawl on your hands. All it takes to simmer a disagreement and quell anger is one person who chooses to exercise his right to zip it.


When your actions will suffice
The saying, “Actions speak louder than words,” has been around for a long time. Maybe you have proven its wisdom repeatedly in your life. Whether to convey a positive message or drive home a serious point, your actions can speak louder when you zip it.


When your heart and head don’t agree
On your life’s journey, you will encounter crossroads, with your heart and head sending opposing messages. You may cry on shoulders for advice and what friends and family members offer may give you comfort. Yet, many times, the clarity, direction and purpose you need, come through in the silence created when you cease rehashing the issue and zip it.


When your words may do more harm than good
It is human nature, it seems, to get one-up on others, have the last say and come out on top. Frequently, the urge to slather people with your words—set them straight and put them in their place, is fuelled by a false sense of superiority. In an effort to wield the sword, you open your mouth and words come out that may be more callous than you intended. Better sense and compassion might prevail, if you step back from the situation and zip it. 


Do people avoid you or blatantly tell you that you talk too much? Are you creating an avalanche of advice by repeating your troubles? Is the constant exchange of words jeopardizing your relationships and ruining your chances of a job promotion or some personal success? It might be time to do things differently. Display some grace and self-control and zip it.

Blogathon 2012 - May 28. Don't quit; take just one more step

Often, just when you think you can't take another step, when the voices of your detractors drown out the voices of your supporters, when your fears loom larger than ever, when your self-confidence is sitting in the dust a mile or two back and your passion is merely a flicker, that is the perfect time to take one small step forward. Do it with your eyes closed (if you must), but do it. For the sake of the dream that once held your heart captive. Do it.

Take the step and you'll see. Your passion will blaze again, your self-confidence with catch up to you. You'll feel alive and brave and capable again.

Blogathon 2012 - May 27. Easing back into my normal

Although the cough will linger for a while, I feel much better today. It's time to ease my way back into my normal.

So, here's my plan for today:

Have breakfast - buttermilk biscuits with butter and cheese and big mug of coffee
Do overdue laundry
Quick spin with the vacuum cleaner
Fold and put away clothes from last laundry day
Shower

*** take a break ***

Cook - for the first time in three days
Finish an article to submit tonight
Work on other assignments

*** take a break ***

Read
Play with grandchildren
Shower
Have a light dinner
Bed - read, write in my journal
Maybe watch a movie on my Tablet
Say goodnight

Blogathon 2012 - May 26 Still.

The fever did not return today. WOO HOO! The other symptoms persists, so I have a way to go before I get back to my old self.

Still, it's not all bad because I've been getting some much needed bed time and that's not something to gripe about.

Blogathon 2012 - May 24. On the pages of my journal

Writing has been an integral part of my life since I was about seven years old. I think it began with seeing my parents, especially my mother, lost in books. I fancied seeing my face on the cover of a book, telling stories of my life.

I don’t remember why or how or when it began but I choked up and grew silent in tense situations but was always moved to respond by writing. When my mother scolded me, I responded with a letter of apology and/or a written explanation. That habit followed me through to my adult life. People didn’t care to read the letters I wrote under troubling, angry and painful circumstances.

“What’s this?” was their usual reaction/response, which made me feel foolish and angry. Still, I couldn’t manage to get a word past my lips. In fact, their dismissive questions and disparaging remarks succeeded only in cementing my silence, which angered them further,

Some of the journals that hold the stories of my life 

In time, although my silence continued, I stopped writing my letters and switched to pouring out my feelings in my journals. 

If you asked how journaling has impacted my life, I'd say:

On its pages, I discover answers to troubling questions.

On its pages, I understand the circumstances in my life, the issues that plague me, my relationships and my dreams. 

On its pages, I brainstorm solutions to problems, make decisions and devise actions to move those decisions forward. 

On its pages, I deposit bits and pieces of my own life experiences and life in general. 

On its pages, I decipher the hidden reasons behind my fears, why I procrastinate and feel blocked with my writing and the real stories behind the stories I feel compelled to write.

I suppose, in a sense, I can say that it is on the pages of my journal that I live the deep aspects of my life. 

Blogathon 2012 - May 23. Some days....I let things go

Most days are productive. I get most of my to-do's done in a timely manner. I might even manage to get a bit of silence and solitude somewhere in the busyness that prevails.

But some days... I just let things go. I let things slide. I let go of everything, even the things that I enjoy doing. Today was one of those days. I felt as if my energy and enthusiasm did not get out of bed with my body. So I chucked everything that wasn't necessary for life and health and joy (yes, joy).

I did only what was absolutely necessary: had breakfast, showered, got my granddaughter ready and dropped her to school. When I returned, I fed my grandson and put him in his crib (he sleeps for three to four hours in the morning). SWEET! I had a second shower and slipped back into bed.

After the most glorious two-hour mid-morning nap, I stepped back into the day, a wee bit refreshed and energized. I managed two loads of laundry, a bit of tidying in the main living areas and shopped the freezer for a late lunch - God bless the person who invented it. Now I can dedicate several hours to writing and reading.

It hasn't always been this easy to let things go on days like today but I've learned to recognize such days early enough to take action (or no action as the case may be) early. I deal with days like today, in the way that works for me - I just let things go. I let them slide until I feel ready to handle them. I've learned too, that letting things go, is a gift I give myself. Moreover, when I treat myself with this brand of loving care, I am a more loving and caring person to others.

What do you do when you have one of these days?  

Blogathon 2012 - May 22. Peeling back the layers

Often to get to the heart of who we are and what we want, we have to peel back the layers of our lives. Many of those layers were applied when we were young and impressionable. Others we adopted to shield ourselves from real or imagined pain.

Eventually, we arrive at a juncture where we recognize that we are not living authentic lives. We feel the need to get back to our true selves. But we see only layers of beliefs, personality traits, personal preferences, etc. that do not portray who we truly are. We can't afford to waste time bemoaning our past, battling our present circumstances or fearing the future. This is a time to begin peeling back those inaccurate, deceptive and debilitating layers to get back to the heart of our true selves, so that, we can make the decisions and take the actions that will take us on the path to authentic living, every day and in every situation.

Blogathon 2012 - May 21. Maddening Mondays

No matter how I play it - Mondays are always busy and I call them Maddening Mondays. Take today - So many chores that simply had to be done. The good thing is that I completed my Monday to-do's.

The key for me - breathe deeply, write the list in order of priority, work top to bottom - ticking off chores as I go, do each thing mindfully, maintain a grateful attitude for all the appliances and gadgets and tools that help me to complete all my Monday chores efficiently.

So as Monday draws to a close, I relax with the satisfaction that nothing has been left undone, nothing will be carried forward to tomorrow and I feel capable of accomplishing anything tomorrow brings.

Tonight, all's well in my little corner of the world.